ABC

A. Age: 20! It's my favourite age so far! :)

B. Bed size: Well since I'm living in dorm I have been blessed with a twin-sized bed. But one day I will have a KING-sized bed. One day...
C. Chore that you hate: I really enjoy cleaning, raking, shovelling the snowy driveway ect...so there's not much that I hate. But out of all of them it would be cleaning toilets or shower drains.
D. Dogs: I would love to have an Albino German Shepherd one day. Or of course, a loyal golden retriever. :)
E. Essential start to your day: A prayer to God...I need Him so badly...
F. Favorite color: Baby pink...seafoam green...pastel colours.
G. Gold or Silver: A month ago I would have chosen silver, but lately I've had a certain fascination for all things vintage...so I would have to go with gold.
H. Height: 5’8"
I. Instruments you play: Currently I don't play any. I used to play flute and piano.
J. Job title: Full-time Student & Lovin' It.
K. Kids: One day...far, far away...
L. Live: I live in Canada. Which by the way has just been recently titled to have "World's Best Reputation". No big deal. ;)
M. Mother’s name: Mommyyyyyyyy
N. Nicknames: Jiwi, Jenners, Nenny, Babycakes...
O. Overnight hospital stays: Zero!
P. Pet peeves: Holes in socks. When people use the same word twice in one sentence. See-through shirts.
Q. Quote from a movie: “It's quite cool!" -Lord of The Rings.
R. Right or left handed: Right-o
S. Siblings: 3...wish I had more though!
T. Time you wake up: Between 7 and 8 AM.
U. Underwear: Is quite essential.
V. Vegetable you hate: I know that tomatoes are technically a fruit, but I HATE them.
W. What makes you run late: Anything and everything; I am very easily distracted!
X. X-Rays you’ve had: I don't think I've had any.
Y. Yummy food that you make: I'm not much of a cooker, but I absolutely love baking! I love baking muffins, cakes, cookies mmm! :) Actually this weekend I'm attempting a spinach pie, we'll see how that goes.
Z. Zoo animal: snow leopards, jaguars, or cheetahs!

Repression;

"Repression involves placing uncomfortable thoughts in relatively inaccessible areas of the subconscious mind. Thus when things occur that we are unable to cope with now, we push them away, either planning to deal with them at another time or hoping that they will fade away on their own accord.

The level of 'forgetting' in repression can vary from a temporary abolition of uncomfortable thoughts to a high level of amnesia, where events that caused the anxiety are buried very deep.
Repressed memories do not disappear. They can have an accumulative effect and reappear as unattributable anxiety or dysfunctional behavior. A high level of repression can cause a high level of anxiety or dysfunction, although this may also be caused by the repression of one particularly traumatic incident..."

My New Home.

This dorm room of mine is definitely a reflection of who I am; I mean just by looking at it you would say: That is so Jenny, complete with pink, flowers, pink, Arizona iced tea bottles, pink, floral everything, pink, a globe, pink, pictures from Paris, and oh and pink! :)

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A Year Ago...

Exactly a year ago I was starting my first day at Bodenseehof Bible College in Germany...and one year later, here I sit...reminiscing in awe.

A year ago I was a completely different girl--and I don't miss her at all.

A year ago God was merely an afterthought--and today, His love overwhelms me.

I miss my multi-cultural family of 108 guys and girls. I miss the impact we had on each other, all the tears we cried together, and all the joy we shared. I think about them and I pray for them all the time. And I can't wait until we all walk those golden streets together, the streets of Heaven.

I regret so badly all the times I wasn't content during those six months abroad. Why is that? Why am I never content in the place I'm at? Why am I always living for the "next"? I regret, because all I want is to go back.

But in the here and now, God is challenging me, and everyday He is blessing me abundantly. And of the many blessings are the memories He has provided me with; each and every one of these memories is God telling me, "Jenny, look at everything I've given you...can't you see? I love you!"

A year ago God gave me the strength to run my very first 10k race.

A year ago God showed me what a true friendship looked like; the sharing of your deepest insecurities, your past, your testimony, and completely accepting one another with no judgement. And He showed Himself through many, many people in my life.

A year ago God taught me that I didn't need to be afraid of praying out loud; yes, prayer to God is a very personal thing, but it can also be a very moving thing to whoever's listening. Have you ever heard somebody pray for you? It is absolutely and wonderfully humbling.

A year ago I had finally heard what God had been telling me all 19 years of my life: that I am beautiful. I don't need makeup to feel pretty, I don't need to be skinny to consider myself worthy of any guy's attention, and I don't need to be talented to be liked by others.

A year ago God spoke to me: "stand before the entire school and share your testimony."
"But God, why? I don't want to...I'm too scared..."
He replied with two words, and my heart began to race. "Trust me."
The evening I shared my testimony for the first time, I had no idea that out of it great things would happen. I had no idea that my words would impact another student in the crowd...and that it would draw the two of us together. I had no idea that he would be a part of my life still one year later. I had no idea that our testimonies to Christ were the cliffs God lead us to, to fall deep into love. The evening I shared my testimony, I just had no idea that my life would be forever changed. Looking back I have learned that because I pushed all my fear and insecurities aside and chose to listen to God's voice, He has blessed me so much.

A year ago I went on my very first mini-missions-trip; it was a complete step out of my comfort zone, but God was with me 100% of the way. And right now, I can see myself doing that in the future. I can see myself absorbing the scripture and God's love like a sponge, and then reaching OUT.

A year ago my life changed, but as for today what is happening? God is still teaching me, and I don't think He'll ever stop. He is teaching me to be content in my circumstances, to put the feelings of others before mine, to trust Him with every ounce of my heart, and to thank Him as often as I can for blessing me so greatly.

Dear Jesus, thank you for the past 20 years of my life and especially for the past year that you gave to me. I feel so alive, and I know that it's all because of You. Teach me to be content, to be patient, and to take each day one day at a time. Teach me not to live for myself, but for Eternity. Love Jenny.

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Happy Birthday, to my man. =)

There was a girl dark haired and wide eyed
Looked at the world strong willed and not afraid to put up a fight
She appeared tough on the outside
One look at her and he made up his mind
I'm yours for a lifetime
One thing lead to another
Now we're standing here together

You'll still be running by my side
When the world falls to its knees
And we'll still be dancing
when the world has lost the ability to hear
a symphony

One look from you and I know I'm beautiful
You give me courage to admit when I'm wrong and start over
So at the start of every adventure
Peering over the edge with you is where I want to be
It's where you'll find me

One foot in front of the other
Here's to hand in hand forever
'Cause you'll still be running by my side
When the world falls to its knees
And we'll still be dancing
when the world has lost the ability to hear
a symphony

Can you hear the stars
singing out our song?
When you reach for me
the heavens sing along
Can you hear my heart
pounding out a melody
that I belong with you
and you belong with me?

You'll still be running by my side
When the world admits defeat
And I'll still run home to you
when the world has made me bleed
And we'll still be dancing
when the world has lost the ability to hear
a symphony


-Amanda Falk


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Never Truer.

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Help Me.

Dear God,

Help me to be patient.

Help me to trust in You.

Help me to believe that You will do everything in Your timing.

Help me remember how much You really love me and care for me.

And while I'm in this waiting period, help me to show this love to everyone around me.

The Best Ever.

Arizona Green Tea. :)

Represent!

College #3

This is me in my new dorm room (you see those flowers? I went for a jog one morning to be given those to for free from a wonderful lady who saved them from her wedding! See, exercising pays off!). Yes, that's right, you heard me; I am in college again.

(Summer treated me well by the way. My favourite part was being in Maryland and experiencing an earthquake AND a hurricane, all in the span of one week! Oh, and New York City was pretty cool too.)

The number one conversation I've had within the past week is: "so Jennifer, are you a freshman here?"

"Kinda, but not really; I'm more of what you call a 'transfer student'..."

*cue the wide eyes and high pitchy voice*

"OH COOL! Where'd you transfer from?!"

"Well, long story short. After high school I attended a prestigious Christian university in Western Canada. And then I decided to study at a small Bible school on the other side of the world, in Germany."

And now I am here...again at a Bible college, but this time I'm nowhere near the Pacific Ocean, the Rocky Mountains, German chocolate, Paris, or Spain.

In fact, I am surrounded by 10 wheat fields, a highway, a couple dirt roads, and a tree. I am in the middle of nowhere. Oh and better yet, I am car-less.

On a brighter note, I am taking some absolutely amazing courses with professors whom I absolutely love:

Foundations of Youth Ministry

Cultural Anthropology

Intro to Theology

History of Christianity

Psychology of Human Development: Children

American Literature of the 20th Century

Yes, you counted right, six courses. But honestly, school and studying are my element. I'm that girl who loves taking notes and writing down all her assignments in her day-planner and then spends every spare minute of her time in the library. I love it! If only I could get paid to do this...

What I also love is having my boyfriend (of 9+ months) here with me at college. I am so proud to say that we conquered long-distance, therefore, we are pretty much capable of anything. :) :)

During the first week of school I had a audition for the college's choir. A few days later I found out that the audition went pretty well apparently, not only was I accepted into the choir, but I had a callback to also join the more so-called "elite" smaller choir. That was cool news, I mean, it was a decent self-esteem booster, but that's all it was. I didn't end up joining the choir and I didn't end up going to callbacks. Despite all the pressure I felt to join, I decided to call a rain check on that one. It may sound like nothing to you, but not joining the choir/s was the best thing I could have done for myself. For the first time ever I possessed a backbone and said a firm "no, thanks". Sure, I probably disappointed some people in my life, but I sure as heck didn't disappoint myself; I have complete confidence that God has other things in mind for me. And He has flooded my body and soul with His incredible peace. :)

Hmm. I am making all of it sound much easier than it really is. This third college experience of mine has been good. Yes. It has...but God is definitely testing me. (Notice the present-tense) Honestly, right now He is testing me in so many ways and I feel like it's more than I've ever been used to. Things have been good but it's also been hard. God is just telling me that I need to be patient, and that I need to trust in Him. To have patience and trust. Trust and patience. I may or may not elaborate on this more...one day...maybe...

This morning I read the book of Philippians and I underlined and scribbled it like crazy. I recommend it.

Peace and Love!

Face.

It's actually amazing how one day you can have the lousiest of mornings, and then you see that one person's face and everything in the world is suddenly beautiful and exactly as it should be. :)