So, life is good. And as for the stress, I have been handling it well, and God has really opened my eyes and revealed to me the things that are more important in life: Being with the people you love, encouraging them, and lifting them up in love. It's so easy for me to stress myself out out of such little things that don't even matter, so I'm very thankful for a God who has the power to turn the switch on my brain.

I have officially been home from Germany for almost a whole month now, but it actually feels like I've been home for like...4 months! So much happens in a day and each day is a surprise! Unfortunately, I haven't been keeping up with my blog as much as I would have liked, but I'm trying.

In all honesty, I keep myself at home alot with my family. Is this dorky? No. I remember in high school you were considered to be "uncool" if you made time for your family, but that's because in high school your head isn't screwed on straight, at least...mine wasn't. But now, after plenty of livin' and learnin', I have just come to realize that my parents, my sisters, my brothers, and my two nieces are the most important things in my life and I am so blessed to be able to call them mine! And since I know that I'm not gonna be living at home forever, I really need to make the most of these few months and really be home at home. What is also exciting is that tonight I'm picking up my boyfriend from the train station and so he'll get to be a part of my crazy, weird family for a couple of weeks! I cannot wait!!! :)

April was a good month. It began with tears and dread at the beginning when I had to say goodbye to my life in Germany, but it quickly turned into relaxation and joy as my life at home in Canada swung into full motion. Thank you, God. :)

Me & God

There ain't nothing that can't be done
By me and God
Ain't nobody come in between me and God
One day we'll live together
Where the angels trod
Me and God

Early in the morning talking it over
Me and God
Late at night talking it over
Me and God
You could say where like two peas in a pod
Me and God

He's my Father
He's my friend
The beginning
And the end
He rules the world
With a staff and rod
We're a team
Me and God

I am weak and he is strong
Me and God
He forgives me when I'm wrong
Me and God
He's the one I lean on
When life gets hard
Me and God

He's my Father
He's my friend
The beginning
And the end
He rules the world
With a staff and rod
We're a team
Me and God

He rules the world
With a staff and rod
We're a team
Me and God


-Josh Turner

Grasp.

I went to bed last night feeling completely stressed and woke up this morning feeling well, completely stressed. It's amazing how all the little things in life can magnetize themselves together and squeeze the four walls of your brain together until it hurts.

It is during moments like these when I have the power to convince myself that I am on my own; I can trick my mind into thinking that in this world, it is just me, myself, and I. And the only person who can get me through this life is me. This mindset doesn't empower me! It burdens me! It scares me! And then I get even more stressed out because I feel like I am just inadequate.

The words "I will never leave you nor forsake you" (Hebrews 13:5) are so simple yet...so very hard to understand. We could have it memorized and say it to ourselves all day long and STILL not understand what it means. When God tells us that He will never leave us or forsake us, He means that He is ALWAYS with us. He is ALWAYS there to carry our burdens. He is with us when the tears fall, when we feel like everybody has left us, and when we are experiencing pure joy. God is with us when we are stressing out for a huge upcoming exam at school, when we are standing in front of a crowd of 100 people, and when we are on an airplane flying to a foreign country on our own.

So, in conclusion, God is with me, and God is strong. Therefore, I have no need to feel stressed because He carries my burdens and with His help everything works out for the better! Now all I need to do is just grasp this amazingness.

Semester 2 Highlights.

I attended Bodenseehof Bible School in Germany for six months and had an absolutely amazing time. When stepping on German soil for the first time I was broken and my emotional baggage was unfortunately rather sufficient. But God used these six months away from home in a new environment and forming new relationships to reveal His love to me and changed me from the inside out. It's an experience I will NEVER forget. The following photos are some of the highlights of my second semester at Bible School. (It's part two of my first semester highlight blog entry!) I cannot believe that I have been home from Germany for almost a month now, and looking at these photos brings me so much joy!

Cafe Hoepker, located near the school. My two best friends and I sat in this cafe for over three hours sharing exciting stories from our Christmas break apart, over a cup of thick hot chocolate. :)

Every morning after our breakfast dish duty we would nominate one person from the team to be "Rose" (from Titanic), who would sit on the front of the trolly and be pushed down the hallway. You should have seen the principals face when he encountered this. Haha!

For my 20th birthday (January 9th) my old roommates threw me a birthday party dinner and bought me a chocolate cake sprinkled with Crispy M&Ms!!

The laundry room. Let's just say it was the beginning of something great. :)

We all switched rooms at the beginning of the semester and this was my new bed, complete with TWO drawers! :) 

Ohh and the cuddle puddles were endless!

I received a package in the mail filled with Star Wars sugar cookies! :)

The breakfast dishes crew decided to take a photo together when we discovered that we were all wearing black one day!

80s Nerd Day. Note the epic Star Wars socks ;)

The three of us filmed a ridiculous video to Relient K's "12 days of Christmas" in the weight room.

The Outreach team in Neuenmarkt. 

Brandi played songs for my roommates and I on our balcony. :)

Watching the boys play football on a warm February day.

My first karaoke experience in SPAIN!

Spain was absolutely gorgeous!

I received my very first rose from my very first boyfriend on Valentines Day. :)

A bunch of us took the train down to Lindau one day. So fun!

Lindau!

The girls of my K-group and I digging into our Pizookie (warm and gooey underbaked cookie dough topped with vanilla ice cream)

My man and I on the train to Munich.

While Jessica was gone on Outreach, we pranked her by wrapping ALL of her possessions in newspaper. Best. Prank. Ever.

One night I crawled into my bed to find it completely saran-wrapped!!

Moustache March...yikes...

Strasbourg, France.

I loved seeing everybody sprawled out on the grass when the weather was nice. What a great community!

My awesome singteam and I performing for Friends Day at our school. I'll never forget my 6 month experience with them.

Many walks were taken. Germany is beautiful!

My FAVORITE German chocolate...complete with two plastic spoons!

We took a school trip to Dachau concentration camp. We were only able to spend a little over an hour there unfortunately, but I was glad for the opportunity.

Yearbook signing party!

The Final Spring Banquet. Cheers!

Sarah, Jessica, and I. I mentioned these girls in a blog entry I had written back in October or November of last year. Together we formed an accountability group, and together they changed my life. I love them and miss them dearly!

All of the wonderful men and women of God who worked as staff at Bodenseehof. I'm so thankful for their love and guidance.

My last dinner at La Taverna. (french fry pizza, anyone?)

My last "photobooth" picture at school. We are all wearing our matching school t-shirts too. :)

I am so thankful to God for giving me three more beautiful months in Germany. With full confidence, I can say that these were the best six months of my entire life. But what I also know is that life is super exciting and God has so much more planned for me! :)

Good Friday.

I will not boast in anything, no gifts, no power, no wisdom.

But I will boast in Jesus Christ; His death, and resurrection.

Life in Pause?

If my life is a movie, then today the "pause" button was pushed. I was sick and for a good seven hours I did the following: drank a glass of milk, lay on the couch, sat on the couch, put on a sweater, took off my sweater, heated up a plate of lasagna, ate a quarter of that lasagna, filled up my pink fuzzy hot water bottle and hugged it for all seven hours, watched an episode of Gilmore Girls, drank a cup of green tea, watched two more episodes of Gilmore Girls, drank another cup of green tea, put my flannel sweater back on, moved to my bed, still hugged my hot water bottle, almost shed a "self-pity tear", wrote in my journal, ate an orange, talked with my sister on the phone, read a book, tried to nap...that failed, got out of my bed, drank another cup of green tea...and here I am now!


Before all of this awesomeness-of-a-day occured, I was struggling with the issue of feeling lazy. I do not have a job, and I am not in school; therefore, I feel like I am useless. Therefore, I feel like my life is on pause because I'm simply not doing anything. But the thing is, is that my life isn't on pause. Time is still ticking and God is still working. For instance, every single day of my life is a gift from God, and I can glorify Him by showing His love to others. I don't want to think of this day as a "waste of time" I want to think of it as a precious gift.
I struggle with the issue of feeling guilty for not having a job, or for not being in school. It makes me feel like I'm not talented, or productive; it makes me feel like I'm just wasting my life away. But with much prayer, God is letting it slowly sink in that I'm not who I am because of my talents or accomplishments. I'm not special because of what I've DONE, I'm special because of who I AM.
So what am I? What is our identity in Christ?


1 Peter 2:4 states that we are "...a living stone rejected by men, but in the sight of God: Chosen and Precious."


John 1:12 states that "...all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God."


According to Matthew 5:14 we are "the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden."


And my favorite verse Hebrew 13:5 tells us that God will "NEVER leave you or forsake you." We are never alone.


To whoever's reading, I hope this encouraged you as much as it encouraged me. God is good, and on our so-called paused-sick days he is STILL good.

God Alone.

This song is absolutely amazing. Every time I listen to it it seems to put my life back into perspective and it reminds me why I'm living and who I'm living for. It reminds me just how powerful God is and that He is on His throne, watching over us. We have nothing to be afraid of.

You are not a god

Created by human hands

You are not a god

Dependant on any mortal man

You are not a god

In need of anything we can give

By Your plan, that's just the way it is

You are God alone

From before time began

You were on Your throne

Your are God alone

And right now

In the good times and bad

You are on Your throne

You are God alone

You're the only God

Whose power none can contend

You're the only God

Whose name and praise will never end

Youre the only God

Whos worthy of everything we can give

You are God

And that's just the way it is

You are God alone

From before time began

You were on Your throne

Your are God alone

And right now

In the good times and bad

You are on Your throne

You are God alone

Unchangeable

Unshakable

Unstoppable

That's what You are

Goodbye Germany.

Today is Saturday April 2nd, which means, I have less than two hours left here at Bodenseehof Bible School before I'm forced to check out. I've been awake for over 48 hours...I have pulled two all-nighters in a row and I am just waiting for the ultimate crash right now. I'll let you know when that happens...

There have been many, many tears this morning and I feel like my heart has just been ripped out. 108 goodbyes is hard to do. Saying goodbye to the people who have changed you so much into becoming a better person and those whom have helped drastically transform your relationship with God is hard to do. But the cool thing is the confidence is knowing that if we don't see each other again here one earth, we'll see each other again at the wedding feast in Heaven.

I'm still at the Bode at this very moment, in between saying goodbyes. I have the whole day to spend frolicing around this little town with some friends here so it'll be a good distraction from all of these hard goodbyes and from my sad little empty heart. I'm going to buy alot of German chocolate...alot.

I wonder if I will sleep tonight? If I don't that'll be a total of 72 consecutive hours awake! How fun.

I am excited beyond belief to get home though, to my real home...my Canadian home. My wonderful family is waiting for me and my two suitcases of German goodies!

I can't believe how fast six months can fly. And I can't believe what God can do with you when you let Him have total control. He can do anything, and for that I praise Him. :)